Tom Lehrer - Alma - текст песни, слова, перевод, видео

Last December 13th, there appeared in the newspapers the juiciest, spiciest, raciest obituary it has ever been my pleasure to read. It was that of a lady named Alma Mahler Gropius Werfel, who had, in her lifetime, managed to acquire as lovers practically all of the top creative men in central Europe. And, among these lovers, who were listed in the obituary, by the way, which is what made it so interesting, there were three whom she went so far as to marry: One of the leading composers of the day, Gustav Mahler, composer of "Das Lied von der Erde" and other light classics, one of the leading architects, Walter Gropius, of the "Bauhaus School of Design", and one of the leading writers, Franz Werfel, author of the "Song of Bernadette" and other masterpieces.

It's people like that who make you realize how little you've accomplished. It is a sobering thought, for example, that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years!

It seemed to me, on reading this obituary, that the story of Alma was the stuff of which ballads should be made, so here is one:

The loveliest girl in Vienna

Was Alma, the smartest as well

Once you picked her up on your antenna

You'd never be free of her spell

Her lovers were many and varied

From the day she began her beguine

There were three famous ones whom she married

And God knows how many between . . .

Alma, tell us:

All modern women are jealous

Which of your magical wands

Got you Gustav and Walter and Franz?

The first one she married was Mahler

Whose buddies all knew him as Gustav

And each time he saw her he'd holler:

„Ach, that's the fraulein I must have!“

Their marriage, however, was murdah

He'd scream to the heavens above:

„I'm writing Das Lied von der Erde

Snd she only wants to make love!“

Alma, tell us:

All modern women are jealous

You should have a statue in bronze

For bagging Gustav and Walter and Franz

While married to Gus she met Gropius

And soon she was swinging with Walter

Gus died and her teardrops were copious

She cried all the way to the altar

But he would work late at the Bauhaus

And only came home now and then

She said: „What am I running, a chow house?

It's time to change partners again!“

Alma, tell us:

All modern women are jealous!

Though you didn't even use Ponds

You got Gustav and Walter and Franz

While married to Walt she met Werfel

And he too was caught in her net

He married her but he was careful

'Cause Alma was no Bernadette

And that is the story of Alma

Who knew how to receive and to give

The body that reached her embalmah

Was one that had known how to live!

Alma, tell us:

How can they help being jealous?

Ducks always envy the swans

Who get Gustav and Walter

You never did falter

With Gustav and Walter and Franz!

I know some people feel that marriage as an institution is dying out, but I disagree. And the point was driven home to me rather forcefully not long ago by a letter I received which said: „Darling, I love you, and I cannot live without you. Marry me, or I will kill myself.“ Well, I was a little disturbed at that until I took another look at the envelope, and saw that it was addressed to "Occupant"...

Speaking of love, one problem that recurs more and more frequently these days, in books and plays and movies, is the inability of people to communicate with the people they love: husbands and wives who can't communicate, children who can't communicate with their parents, and so on. And the characters in these books and plays and so on, and in real life, I might add, spend hours bemoaning the fact that they can't communicate. I feel that if a person can't communicate, the very least he can do is to shut up!