Задумайся - дневник памяти - текст песни, слова, перевод, видео

Someone says that the glass is easier to swallow than the truth. I agree with them. I loved to dance and draw angels. And then life seems to be again. I was almost 17, and then I saw her a little from another angle. When I was 17, I lost my best friend. And it was tragic enough for me to close. They called me and said that Sasha was gone. I went home, and could not believe that everything that was up to this moment disappeared once and for all, as if there was no at all. My whole life, which I remember from the kindergarten - how I gave me the first flowers, how funny they joked at the breaks, how I was tearing me up by escorting me home - all this became one empty sound. And if I had been asked about breathing then, I would say nothing and draw a dotted line. In the pharmacy, buying another sedative, you can hear the songs from which it is sick, you can hear people who listen to the songs, and then they are sick of each other, and the pains are not visible, because the soundless insides have already been exhausted. And a year later I heard a phone call, a telephone voice and hung up. The truck driver fell asleep, driving into the oncoming lane, crashing into the car of my parents.

The heart was torn from the inside, because the diagnosis of loneliness is like ice by the scalp, that you can not sew all these wounds. Yesterday, 16 years old and the familiar "do not care", and today you are responsible for everything yourself, without the right to make a mistake. This is the last time, I am almost sure, I know, and I drink again. Today, tomorrow morning ... I lost the score of days, and so lasted more than two years. But every time, standing in the abyss above the roof, something stopped me, and did not allow me to take a step where I could not about To tell this. Of course, I did not want to live, but I did not want to die. Two years ... Two years of life and not life merged for me on the same time, the arrival of spring for me was absolutely not mean. But the trivial expression that spring is an awakening, slashed for me on March 29, 2010. Daily routine: work-house-house-work ... But this day was an awakening for me.

There was death in the subway. Death was nearby, but I am alive. I stayed to live. No. I ... I stayed to live! I have to live! I woke up, point! At first I gained joy, the joy of living. I took care of this joy inside myself as once in childhood I took care of my drawings. And after the joy, the meaning came. My meaning is not in the ministry, and not even in the work that I fell in love with. Although it is so joyful to see the smiles of children who look at my drawings in children's books. My meaning is to meet him - my love. I started writing a book. Here are the first lines, maybe nonsense, I don’t know, but I want to re -read again: “When the views are found, a miracle happens. And then two become one, and with how their love grows, they create another, one thing. This is one thing. Maybe anyone can be you, or it can be me ... so at first I was two, and now I am alone. Only one. I'm nothing, only half looking for the second. In search of the missing part I look for someone who will take care of someone who will understand, someone who loves, who will give joy, who will create, who will illuminate, someone good, funny, interesting, sweet, someone special, someone He will fill the void in my heart and make it whole. I will not stop looking for him until I find it. And I will find it. ”